New Schedule

by Heligirl on January 6, 2010

in Daily Ramblings

This week I started my new work schedule, which was like the third new work schedule in the past two years, but who’s counting. I’ve been really blessed to have a job that works with me being a mom. As long as I do my job, which does entail a certain amount of 24/7 on-call status, my superiors have been fabulous with supporting my shifting schedule. I got to cut my hours and spend more time with my little girl when I returned to work after her birth, then after my son was born, I shifted the hours around a bit more to accommodate my daughter’s preschool. That would have been just fine except after I returned home from my first day of work back from maternity leave my nanny informed me she was going to go to work for my nanny share partner in January as she’d offered her more money and better hours (the same pay to work three days all day for what I was paying to work half days every day). Funny, I’d been unaware at the time that there was a bidding war. To make a long story short, my desire to please everyone lead to me losing the nanny three days a week. I was pissed off, to put it mildly. I’d been the one who approached my nanny share partner to put together the partnership. I did the work to find the nanny, get the legal paperwork together, background check the nanny AND I ended up paying for many more hours a week than I really needed so she could make a livable wage. Clearly, that didn’t matter to her. As she said, “it’s just business.”

While my natural reaction at the time was to immediately fire the nanny, I took a step back and reassessed everything. I hate this saying, but many, many times it is true – “A kick in the butt is a step forward.” The biggest example is when I had a roommate who had anger issues. We began to rub each other the wrong way when I’d had enough and she felt she had the right to evict me since she was the person on the lease and was renting rooms in the house out to others. I was furious. As I went looking for another place, someone suggested I buy something. I did my research and low and behold, I could afford to buy. If that roommate hadn’t have “wronged” me, I’d not have gotten my first house which lead to the one I’m in now. So, when the red seeps out of my eyes from things like this, I try to see what the opportunity is that I’d have missed if this hadn’t have happened.

Having a nanny for an infant in your own home with one other child your child’s age is a good thing. But now the kids were pushing 2 ½ and they need socialization. Another down side to continuing to have the nanny full time was the care was at my place 100 percent of the time since I have two children. There was a considerable amount of wear and tear on my daughter’s toys and no one offered to pitch in on basic things like diaper pal bags or to help take home a full diaper pail bag, let alone replace torn books or broken toys. I was paying to trash diapers for three. Not having another child here was not such a bad idea. Maybe now was a good time to look into a child care option for my daughter that offered more socialization, a different – almost school-like – atmosphere, and the chance to do something different.

Turns out there was an opening for just what I needed at the in-home daycare across the street where one of my pals already sends her kids and loves to death. Most of the kids are my girl’s age and potty training, which is where we are with Cuteness. And the owner needs a little marketing and web help so I have the opportunity to do some trade. Perfect. And another pal had a friend who wanted to stay at home with her new baby boy and watch another baby boy. So, it seems, things worked out in the end. My daughter is getting the socialization I want her to experience two days a week, my son is getting to be with a little boy his age two days a week (no toddlers taking away a nanny’s attention), my boss is letting me work longer those two days a week so I can get Wednesdays off to take my girl to preschool then play with my kids all afternoon, and I kept the nanny Mondays and Tuesdays (but this time only for the hours I need) because she really is very good and the kids love her.

Today at preschool I got another sign that this is all a good thing. Other moms were talking about their older kids and the preschools and daycares they attended versus some of their pals’ kids who stay at home with a nanny. “You can totally see the delay in social skills and adaptability,” one said. Yes, I think this is going to work out well, for now.

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